Today I had the greatest day anyone has ever had in the history of the world.
I got up and took an exercise walk on a gorgeous Southern California morning. I love these walks, because they get the blood moving, and oil the joints, and keep the muscles limber. Oh, and they also give me the illusion that I’ve burned enough calories to spend the rest of the day eating pretzels, drinking beer and watching football.
On this particular morning’s walk I also had reason and occasion to stop at the halfway point and walk VERY quickly into a local and popular breakfast restaurant as they were setting up for the day, nod politely to the folks setting out forks (nod, again, VERY quickly), and (more or less) dart into their washroom. Walking (much slower) back out into the early sunlight, and taking an important second to lean against the doorframe and mutter, “Whew,” I continued my power-walk back up the hill.
Then I set out an astonishing breakfast for everyone, including the dog. Four completely different dishes — poached eggs and toast and fruit and coffee for my wife, French toast for Number Two Son, one giant panny-cake and raspberries and sliced strawberries for Number One Son and a scrambled egg for the dog (on top of his dog food: the way he likes it).
Then I had the favorite meal of every father in America: three different items of leftovers from the ‘fridge so that none of it had to be thrown out and go to waste. Not very good separately, and close to revolting all thrown together, they were nevertheless nutritious (with a very loose definition), and I cleared the decks and reloaded the dishwasher correctly after my wife left the room.
Then I laid myself back down in bed and got my wife’s permission to turn on a football game (the one time in the week I hold that sway).
The second half is on now, but I’m writing to you about it.
See, I’ve done this before, and many of you know it. Taken a mundane event and written about it in grandiose detail as if it’s the most important event.
Because, you see, it is. Of course it is. There has never been anything in the history of the world more important or more fun. And you all know it.
What would be better? Playing golf in Hawaii? Hardly.
Climbing a pyramid in Peru? Please.
Looking at the Eiffel Tower? No, thanks.
I’ll take the morning I just had. And so would you. Oh, wait, maybe there’s something greater. Well, if not greater, just as wonderful
See, Brian from Key West wrote in about a story I told on Adam Carolla’s podcast about a parachute instructor. It’s a story that happened twenty years ago that I’ve never forgotten, and I wanted to pass it on. And it had a good effect on him, and THAT, someone telling you something you passed on had an effect, that may be as great as anything, too.
His letter on this site was so meaningful, I retold the parachute story on my podcast this week (it will be out Wednesday on “This Week With Larry Miller”, downloadable for free on iTunes, or Adam Carolla’s new App, or on acelarrymiller.com).
And I’d like to tell it to you, now.
A friend took a sky-diving class twenty or twenty-five years ago, one of those one-day courses where you learn all about it in one day, and at the end of the day you actually jump and do it.
It was funny that when I first told the story, someone at Carolla’s asked me if I had ever done that. ”What?” I said. ”Sky-dive,” she said. ”Have you ever parachuted out of a plane?”
And after a long pause, I said, “Allow me to answer that question by posing another: What do… you think?” She looked at me closely and crinkled her nose, and smiled and said, “Now that I think of it, probably not.”
And I said, “Now you know, like Dr. Norman Vincent Peale, the Power of Positive Thinking.”
Anyway, my friend took the course, and at the end of the day the instructor gathered them all and said, “Okay, you know what to do, you’ve packed the chutes, you’re all set. As you know, you pull the ripcord. Now, the chute is going to open. Don’t worry. It’s definitely going to open. But if, for some crazy, one-in-a-million reason, the ‘chute doesn’t open, pull the auxiliary ripcord. It’s definitely going to open then.”
Then he looked at them and said, “Now, listen to me carefully. If, for some reason, some loony reason, the first ripcord doesn’t work, and then the second ripcord doesn’t work, go back to pulling the first one again.
“You pull that first cord again,” he said. ”And you keep pulling it. Again and again and again.”
Then he said the thing I’ve never forgotten.
He said, “I don’t care if you’re thirty feet above the ground, and about to smoke it in at two hundred miles an hour. I want to see you still pulling that ripcord.”
I don’t think my friend thought much of it, but I knew then that was something I’d never forget. It’s way more than a story about sky-diving, it’s a philosophy of life; an important one.
Keep pulling that cord.
No matter what happens, no matter where, no matter how dire the circumstances… never give up. Never cry or despair, or have regrets. Plenty of time for that soon enough.
You keep pulling that cord.
Brian heard me tell that, and it made a difference to him, which made a difference to me. Not for my vanity. I don’t deserve any credit.
Hell, if anybody deserves a nod and a smile and a pat on the back, it’s that instructor.
Life gets crazier every day, it seems. Monsters roam the Earth and do their evil, whether it’s in dark alleys in our cities, or basements in other continents, or tents in a desert.
Or locker rooms at a university.
We can’t stop it. We can’t see it coming.
All we can do it keep pulling that cord.
REMEMBER: IF YOU WALKED OUT OF BED TODAY, AND HAD THE WHEREWITHAL TO MAKE A NICE BREAKFAST, THERE IS NOTHING IN THE WORLD YOU DON’T HAVE.
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Hello Larry. Can I call ya Larry?
Hey Lar,
I love your podcast, and in fact am currently tweeting to my followers (all 36 of them) that they oughta listen.
I like that it’s just you telling stories and your updates and things.. But I would KILL to hear you do a long episode talking to Norm MacDonald. Well maybe just maim…
You are two of my favorite people in comedy and I think it would end up going down as the best hour or so in podcast history.
Just thought I’d try to get that message to you.
Meanwhile I will keep listening and having a really upbeat half hour at work!
Thanks!
THANK YOU, Larry!
Larry,
Just checking your upcoming dates and am worried about your scheduled appearance on 2/11/12. You seem to be booked at a
P.O. Box in an unlisted city. Things aren’t really that bad are they?
Larry,
Thanks for the story. Truly inspirational — more than you can imagine.
Sincerely,
Andy
Thanks for the response Larry.I’m not sorry to say that I will probably be beating that metaphor into the ground (no pun intended) over the next 40 years, and I’ll be giving you full credit.I’ve just been elected as President of the Key West Shrine Club and will certainly use it when raising money for our kids.If you are ever in Key West I’ll buy you a cocktail. Which, by the way, I was reminded of during my last job, is far better than serving them at 3am. If you get overserved I can always have one of my buddies pick us up in one of those tiny little cars and take you back to the hotel. Cheers.
hey Larry i know youve been married for quite a long time and marriage advice for a young husband seperated from his wife and kids for 70 days now???
Hi Larry,
Loved your show in Richardson Tx…..this is the girl from Ipanema….no, its the girl from Isles Irlandes…no, guess it was Sol Irlandes….well, maybe not girl, but middle aged lady….. or not….at the restaurant across the street from the Eisemann Center…. who lived across the street @ the Renaissance Hotel for 8 mo….. I loved your show so much that I am purchasing tickets for my 2 friends in Chicago to go to the Crystal Lake show next weekend! It’s my early Xmas present to them….. U rock and I never laughed so hard!!! Great show!!!! Waiting to see what shows you will have in 2012 so hopefully my travel assignments will be near one!
Hi Larry,
I missed your show in Richardson, Texas – but really enjoyed meeting you at the Renaissance Hotel the evening you were checking in. I am the sister of the lady who I called “desperate” to get a compliment. You are such a nice man! I’ll be a fan for a long time! I probably won’t follow you around the country — smile..but, will definitely keep up with what you are doing! Especially, now that I have a picture of you. can’t believe i didn’t ask for an autograph. Take care!! Wishing you success!!
Love that!
Larry,
About 23 years ago I took a beautiful woman on our first date to see you perform at Catch a Rising Star in Chicago. You were amazing, and were nice enough to talk with us after your performance. That was the best date I ever had. The relationship would end months later. However, that woman and I have re-connected, been together for over a year now, and this weekend we saw Cocktails with Larry Miller in Crystal Lake, IL. Once again, you killed. And once again, I had an amazing night with the most beautiful woman I have ever known. Thanks for all the laughs. Hope we get to see you again soon!
Okay…have to ask. What’s happened to the “daily” clog. I miss it and your wonderful slant on life. I hope all is well and that you’ve just been too busy.
Come back! Please?
Your keep pulling story was just the antidote I needed for entrepreneurship blues especially when as a small business owner every day seems like a skydive! Look forward to reading more of your stories and perhaps catching your shows in the future
When we stop walking, we stop moving and are one step closer to death. Walking is thinking; it always has been.
Keep walking through this world and enjoying the beauty, the magical garden, it’s an Eden.
When we stop walking, we stop moving… and are one step closer to death. Walking is thinking; it always has been.
Keep moving.
Keep walking through this world and enjoying its beauty; it’s the magical garden, an Eden.
When we stop walking, we stop moving… and are one step closer to death. Walking is thinking; it always has been.
Keep moving.
Keep walking through this world and enjoying its beauty; it\’s the magical garden, an Eden.
Thats the FUN as you say, of being able to take something others may see as nothing and turn it into a nice little journey others want to be a part of – Of course it DOES help tremendously that as comics, we tend to see most things, differently than others…
And I agree, if you walk a bit…then you can eat stuff and then lay down…I am sure I read that in some Dr’s/Medical post!
Looks like in February you and I will be working together again…Something (as always) to look forward to you
Hope you had a nice thanksgiving
Woah this blog is wonderful i like reading your articles. Stay up the good work! You understand, lots of individuals are searching round for this info, you could help them greatly.
Just saw “Deck the Halls” TNT movie with Larry. He was the best part, as usual. Unfortunately on IMDB he is not credited. What gives?
According to old war movies I have seen, the nice thing is, if your parachute fails to open (both of them), that’s OK — they’ll give you a new one.
(That’s the sage advice they’d always tell the newbies, or I guess, recruits.)
Hi Larry,
Just wanted to tell you how much I enjoy your podcast and blog. Hope to meet you in person some day to say hi–you seem like such a genuine and nice individual. Keep up the great and entertaining work!
Wow, marvelous weblog layout! How lengthy have you ever been running a blog for? you made running a blog look easy. The overall look of your web site is great, let alone the content material!
Joke of the Week Submittal:
“2 Peanuts were walking down the street one night….
One was a-salted”
Get it….get it??? hahahaahah
Best and keep up the good work on taking us down memory lane and the way things used to be! Which is one of the reasons why I still use a straight razor for my shaves!
Best always,
James
larry, i travel four days a week and your podcasts keep me going. thankyou for that. for a fellow traveller, could you cover what tips we should leave for the hotel maids. people tip their restaurant waiters whether there service was good or not, but i believe most people do not leave a tip for the hotel maids, because you never see them. come to detroit soon. thanks again
Larry, you’re a great inspiration. You make me want to go down to the local coffee spot at 7:00 am on a Saturday morning and just listen.
You’re a good guy Larry. Thanks for helping us keep everything in perspective. Really enjoy your podcast and appearances on Adam’s podcast.
You\’re a good guy Larry. Thanks for helping us keep everything in perspective. Really enjoy your podcast and appearances on Adam\’s podcast.
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